The following was written after a particularly difficult trip to Walmart.
The rules of engagement when at the store:
1. Mom (or any other adult) is a fool for bringing us all here and thinking she can accomplish anything. Take every opportunity to remind her of that.
2. If you are placed in any given seat in the cart (there are three in the semi-like carts), you must demand to be in a different seat. If moved, you must demand to be in the seat in which you were originally placed.
3. No other child may touch you or your seat at any time, in any way. If this occurs, scream. If you are not being touched by someone else, try to touch them.
4. If Mom lets you hold an item she is going to purchase, drop it at least three times.
5. Whatever you do, don't look Mom in the eyes when she talks to you. Once she's locked eyes with you, you're through.
Disclaimer: Some of these things we didn't teach. Amazingly enough, ALL the kids with me seemed to know the rules already. :)
2 comments:
It's progressed so far in the generations, it is just now inherent, like walking up the slide. :)
That made me laugh out loud...because I can of course relate, even without the Walmart. :)
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